Johnny and Ophelia cuddled together on the sofa without a care in the world, both enjoying each other's company and the warmth of their bodies, with not a single outside thought invading their minds. A couple blissfully happy and very much in love... or so it seemed.
Their eyes closed as their lips softly brushed against each other, Johnny clinging tightly to her as he tried to draw from the heat of her fire. Not for the first time however, her blaze lit a mere candle in his heart. Something was wrong, something he couldn't put his finger on. Even after several months of dating, her touch felt no less strange than it did then, yet as he had done before, he could only put it down to "one of those things". He knew no different.
As their kisses grew stronger, finally something happened. His heart now engulfed in a fire of his own, he responded avidly to her embrace, yet in his mind it wasn't her he was expressing such affection for.
It wasn't until her scent drifted through the air, parting the haze in his mind and pulling him back to reality, that he remembered who he was really with. Mixed feelings of guilt and sadness plagued his heart, and as hard as he tried to hide them, his eyes deceived him.
"You okay?" she checked.
"Sure," he smiled, hoping to convince himself as well as her, "I'm fine."
"Dad, please, stop it!"
"I'm just concerned for you, that's all," Peter soothed, "It's been five months and you still admit her kisses feel odd?"
"I'm startin' to wish I didn't," Johnny grumbled.
"Come on, don't be like that," Peter persuaded, "All we're asking is that you think long and hard about this..."
Johnny looked up at his father in exasperation. The conversation was a follow-on from their talk at dinner after he had surfaced from his school work, and Johnny was now at the end of his rope.
"Why don'tcha jus' come out with it?!" he bit, "You think I'm gay, don'tcha?"
Peter sighed as he watched him, once more faced with a seemingly impregnable barrier. It was always down to the outsiders to see the truth, but try to convince those in the thick of such confusion...
He hadn't known it of course, but as his son flew up the stairs and into his room, the brick wall erected in Johnny's mind came crashing down as he slumped onto his bed.
"This is crazy," he muttered to himself, "How can I be? Surely I'd know about somethin' like that...?"
Wake up and smell the grass, 'gay boy'.
Yeah, cute. Just... gimme a break, huh? Just for a change?
How about you sit up and listen just for a change?! What're you so afraid of, anyways?
Johnny sighed to himself as his eyes closed, the back of his head thumping against the headboard as he tried to make sense of the conflict deep within.
"It's okay sweetie..."
The gentle voice reverberated softly inside his mind, and he grew aware of an arm draping lovingly across his shoulders. He opened his mind's eye and gazed longingly across at the owner.
"Say it Johnny," he encouraged him, "Say how you really feel about me, it's okay..."
Tears of confusion pricked at Johnny's eyes as his heart raced. He wanted to so much, but the words wouldn't come.
"I don't know how I feel," he uttered weakly.
"Oh, I think you do," Ripp purred in reply, a hand reaching towards his face as he spoke, "How long have you been feeling this way, hmm? How long have you been hiding from the truth about yourself?"
"You okay?"
He reacted slowly to the call back to earth, turning in his seat but remaining distant as he began to voice his thoughts.
"How long have I loved him?" he asked no one in particular, yet his instinct told him it would be his father who'd know the answer.
Sure enough, Peter smiled sadly as he gave an understanding nod.
"Ah," he began, before cocking his head. "It's been a long time. Longer than you'd let yourself think for some strange reason."
Johnny's head turned sharply towards him at the response he gave.
"Since we met?" he challenged, beginning once more to drift off as he considered the possibility. "How much of jus' thinkin' he was nice...?"
"Hell of a way to meet though, huh?"
"Yeah," Johnny scoffed, a smile playing upon his lips, "'Sorry about my jerk of a brother beatin' the shit outta ya... I'm Ripp by the way.'"
"Yes," Peter mused, before smiling himself, "It was such a nice surprise to see you bringing someone home."
"Yeah," Johnny grumbled, his heart sinking as resentment crept into his voice, "Only took, what..." He trailed off as he counted on his fingers, consulting his memories where need be. "Eight, nine years?!"
Peter remained quiet as his son floated into a bitter reverie, sensing he had much to expel from his system.
"Even then it was after someone else had a pop at me," Johnny growled, "What is it with these guys?! I'm the same as everyone else; I got feelin's, dreams... I jus' wanna be accepted for a f... damn change!" He calmed a little as a fond smile played upon his lips. "Still, it was a hell of an entrance. Just plough into your iron-pumpin' big brother an' tell him to piss off. I were half expectin' him to start on him too."
Peter chuckled at the irony, breaking his silence with a remark of his own.
"How things can change, huh?" he pondered.
"Yeah," Johnny agreed, "Big bad Tank standin' up for his gay brother" His mind wandered again, this time not too far as he turned to his father. They had pulled up into the hospital car park now, sitting in the stationary vehicle as they continued to talk.
"I love him, Dad," he told him, a wave of relief washing over him as he managed to answer his own question. "I always have..."
"I could tell," Peter smiled as he returned his gaze, "Why do you think I kept asking you to think about your relationship with Ophelia?"
Johnny frowned a little as he pondered the query.
"At the time I didn't know," he recalled, "Couldn't understand where it was all comin' from..."
"Now you do," Peter told him as he ruffled his hair.
"She saw it ages ago too," Johnny confessed, guilt once more gnawing at his heart.
"Hey, come on," Peter reassured him, "You were in no position to question at the time. The most important thing is - well, two things - now you not only know which you prefer, you've also found something rare in this world; true love."
Johnny smiled happily at the statement. You know it's real when others can see it, he mused.
"Hey babes," he answered, "How's it goin'?"
"I'm cool thanks, how are you?"
"Tired," he admitted, emphasising his response with a large yawn, "Was about to catch forty winks..."
"Didn't you sleep too good last night?"
"Uh-uh," he groaned, "Barely slept at all, things got crazy after you left last night."
"How come?"
"Long story," he replied, "I ain't gonna explain over the phone... I need to get to bed before I pass out."
"Oh dear," she remarked sullenly, "Look, was gonna ask about goin' out somewhere later... maybe I can call round in a few hours, let you get some rest?"
"Sounds good," he replied sleepily, before the full weight of her words sank through the fog of fatigue shrouding his thoughts. "Sounds great, I'd love to see you."
"Cool, see you about... one?"
"Yeah, one's great," he agreed, fighting off the arms of slumber just long enough to deliver an important message. "Oh, nearly forgot, I'm at Johnny's..."
"You stopped at Johnny's?"
"Um, yeah," Tank agreed, not wishing to delve any deeper until he was fully conscious.
"Okay, see ya then."
"Yeah, see ya," he signed off, before tossing his phone gently to the desk and crashing into the mattress.
Once he had to fight to feel any spark in his heart when with his partner, now it only took a glimpse of Ripp on his bed as the aliens approached, and instantly Johnny's being was consumed with a deep longing, but also overwhelming sadness. Ripp looked so vulnerable, like a battered child whose only wish was to cower in the furthest corner, away from the cruelty of the very ones he should have been able to trust.
"Hey sweetie," Johnny greeted gently, managing a smile.
Ripp had to force the corners of his lips upwards as his head turned in their direction. Ripp's battle was harder to face than Johnny's however, his blue eyes misted over with the condensation of despair.
"Hey," he uttered as he rose.
Johnny took him into his arms, but was almost afraid to hold him too tightly, lest he found any more bruises upon his love's broken body.
Ripp, in contrast, clung to Johnny as though about to fall from his grip forever, ignoring the dull ache in his blackened flesh in favour of the closeness he so dearly needed, with perhaps the one person left in the world who could show him any form of love.
Johnny pecked his head softly, before Peter hinted that they had better leave. There was only one thing preventing them from doing so, of course, and both aliens became grateful very quickly for being related to someone in the medical field.
"How much??"
Ripp's jaw fell open in astonishment at the figure quoted, but the other two merely arched a disapproving eyebrow. They had anticipated a sum of that quantity, but there was one thing neither were prepared to accept.
"Hold on buddy," Johnny challenged, "You can't expect him to pay for this!?"
"That X Ray machine don't come cheap you know," the admin staff stated bluntly, "I don't care where it comes from, so long as someone settles the tab."
"No no, it's cool," Ripp muttered, but he was clearly far from happy. Peter on the other hand had other plans.
"Don't be silly Ripp," he told him, "You don't have that kind of money." He then turned to the member of staff with a hard face. "Only one guy's paying, and that's the man who put him here in the first place."
"You're sending Dad the bill?!" Ripp exclaimed in disbelief, but Johnny led him away to let his father give details in peace.
"He made the mess," Johnny reminded him, "Let him clean it up."
"I started it!" Ripp persuaded, "If anyone should be paying..."
"Whoa, whoa," Johnny halted, his hands in the air in such a gesture, "You ain't earned any o' this shit, okay? Besides, he's the one in full-time work, and he's probably covered too. You ain't got either, you'd be payin' for the rest of your life!"
Ripp's head sank into his chest as the salt in his tears assaulted his already sore eyes, all that had happened before now beginning to take its toll on his self-esteem.
"I have," he half-whispered, "I deserve everything I got."
Johnny was robbed of his speech for a while, the only thing he felt able to do being to stare helplessly while his heart was sliced open.
"Ripp..." he uttered finally, feeling enough strength return to his soul to work his vocal chords. It was a chore to control the trembling of his jaw, however.
"I do!" Ripp protested, "All I've ever done is piss people off...!"
"That's not true," Johnny stated firmly, now standing tall in the knowledge that he was being truthful. He laid his hands gently upon Ripp's shoulders as he continued to speak.
"You're an amazin' guy Ripp; you helped your brother, not to mention stood up to him when he was givin' me a poundin' that day, despite probably knowin' he could've flattened you there an' then...!"
The clouds about Ripp's mind stubbornly refused to disperse. Tears trickled down his cheeks as years of abuse were unearthed by the events of the previous night.
"Come 'ere," Johnny offered, pulling him into a hug. Only then did he allow his own tears to surface as, somehow, he felt Ripp's pain as though it was his own.
Ophelia paced the porch in anticipation, although the growing length of time spanning her knocks was planting a seed of doubt in her mind. Surely he wasn't still asleep? What about the others - where were they all?
"'Old on, 'old on!" Tank complained on his way to the door, pausing to surrender to a drowsy yawn as his mind struggled to blow away the cobwebs of sleep. He let a smile tug at his mouth as he opened the door, but braced himself for her reaction when he did so - she was bound to notice his black eye. Not to mention the fact that he still hadn't been able to shave, having been woken by her knocks.
"Hey," she grinned as she saw him, moving to place a soft kiss upon his tired lips.
"Hey," he smiled as they broke away, ushering her inside before she could remark on his dishevelled appearance. "Want a drink?"
"Please," she accepted, placing her order as she took a seat. She frowned in bewilderment as Buck followed Jill down the stairs, at first putting it down to a visiting friend, since the two children were quite close. There was the matter of Tank's eye though... what did he mean 'things got crazy after she left?' She shifted uncomfortably in her seat as she pondered the question, not liking the direction her guesses were taking.
No, surely not...
Tank allowed a wry, sad smile to flicker upon his lips as he returned with the drinks. She was too quiet, he noticed. He'd been rehearsing in his mind how to answer the inevitable question when it came, but life seldom goes to plan.
"Thanks," Ophelia accepted, the weak smile as she did so not enough to hide her growing concern as he sat by her.
Tank silently sipped at his drink, dread and sadness building inside as he awaited that fateful grilling. Ophelia didn't lift the mug to her lips, instead quietly running the tip of her index finger along the rim as she chewed over words exchanged on the phone earlier, the blissful parting as she left Peter's car, even the warm feeling she'd experienced at finally seeing Johnny with the person he truly loved. No warmth could be felt now, however - she even gave an involuntary shudder at the chill pervading the atmosphere. Something bad had happened, so bad it had forbidden her new boyfriend the necessity of sleep - he didn't even have time for a shave before answering the door.
"Did I wake you?" she asked carefully. It was obvious she had, but by now she just needed to break the icy silence.
"Yeah, sorry about that," Tank mumbled in reply.
"Hey, it's cool," she smiled, freeing a hand from her cup to lay upon his bare knee.
Tank smiled still only a little in reply, detaching a hand from his own mug to lay upon hers. The emotion he still attempted to suppress began to bubble to the surface as he clutched her hand tightly - how he needed her touch right now.
Alarm was growing inside her as she returned his grip, before setting her mug down. Passing his hand to her other, she glided an arm round his shoulders as she slid closer to him.
"What happened?" she asked softly.
Tank slowly shook his head, a stray tear trickling down his cheek as he struggled to find a way to explain. It was one thing acting the sensible one and calmly explaining to buy a ticket to safety, but the immediate danger was now over. All that remained were the painful memories of watching his younger brother battered by the feet of his own father; he'd been his mentor, his protector, his shelter. The fact that he'd also been his prisoner had been sealed away in his mental filing cabinet.
Save that one for later, Tank - he's still your father.
Now's not the time to remind me!
Ophelia whisked his mug from his fingers as she noticed him start to sob.
"Hey," she soothed, taking him into her arms, expecting him to bury his head into his hands as he wept with not a word. He only did so for a little while though, before clutching at her arm as his words were propelled forth in between his sobs.
"It was Dad," he whimpered, "He caught Ripp with Johnny... there was this big fight... an' he just belted him... coulda left 'im there, but no... he tried to finish the job..."
"What do you mean?" she asked, already feeling her fears becoming confirmed, one at a time.
Tank swallowed the fierce sobs now crawling up his throat as he looked back at her, after glancing about him to make sure the pair were alone. Thankfully for him the children had gone back upstairs, no doubt sensing the atmosphere was less tense elsewhere.
"He kicked the shit outta him," Tank explained, his tone strangely cold. "I was that shocked at first I couldn't move, but what might've happened if I didn't I don't even wanna think about..."
Ophelia swallowed hard as the picture was painted before her eyes. Tank wasn't finished either, she knew that, but did she want him to continue? It was enough that Ripp had suffered so badly...
"How's he doin'?" she asked.
"Johnny and Pete are pickin' him up from minor injuries," he explained, "He broke his wrist when he fell."
"What about your eye?" she pressed, against her better judgement, she was beginning to feel. "Was that him too?"
Tank nodded in reply, a dry smile flickering across his mouth.
"That was an accident," he replied, hastily continuing as he noticed her begin to protest. "No, it was - I dunno what happened exactly, but..." He trailed off in thought for a moment as he pondered his father's words, his actions and body language afterwards. "'Get off me,' he shouted, but he didn't sound angry..." He leaned forward thoughtfully, his fingers pressed against his lips. "In fact he sounded afraid..."
"Afraid!?" she echoed, "He put Ripp in hospital...!"
"I know," Tank agreed, "but someone gave him a scar some time ago. He don't even remember gettin' it, must've got a flashback or somethin'..." He shrugged as he leaned back into the cushions. "That's all I can think of, anyways."
"Wow," was the best she could respond with.
"Yeah," he concurred, before looking back at her. "For some reason, I thought it time we got outta there."
"Good for you!" she congratulated, "So you're all stayin' here?"
Again, Tank nodded before replying.
"Yeah," he added, "An' all those wannabe army clothes of mine are still at Dad's. They can damn well stay there too," he added with a scowl.
"So you've got no clothes?" she checked.
"Nope," he grinned sardonically, "Jus' the clothes I went to the show with..."
She smiled as she came to a decision, tugging at his arm.
"Come on you," she beckoned, "We're goin' shoppin'."
"What with?" he quizzed, watching her rise, "No way would Olive pay for this!?"
"Oh, won't she?" she grinned, reaching into her wallet and producing a credit card.
"That's for you!" he protested as he left his seat.
"It is indeed," she agreed with a wink, "You want a new image, you'll damn well get one!"
"An' you wanna be the one to do it, right?" he tested with a smile.
"You betcha," she grinned, playfully running her fingers along the sandpapery texture of his jaw, "An' that starts with a shave, Mister. Get to it!"
"Yes Ma'am!" he teased in reply, scurrying off to an upstairs bathroom. He paused at the basin, gazing down at the razors lying about the surface, and pulled an apologetic face as he remembered what else he'd left at home.
"Sorry buddy," he said to whoever owned the razor he picked up at random, "All for a good cause, I promise."
1 comment:
They might have lost a father, but they won a wonderful family, the Smiths are wow, what a noble family! great job... and Tank has won a lot of friends... I just hope Ripp will get better soon and stop blaming himself for what happened.
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